I would ask myself all of the time, am I good enough? The constant reminder in my head that I never would be, tortured me and made me restless. Throughout my life I would try my hardest at every single thing, not saying that I shouldn’t have tried my best, but that was the only thing that I would focus on. I desired to be good enough whether that was in school, soccer, relationships, or even for Christ. And if I didn’t reach my goal or didn’t make that person like me or if I failed God, then I failed myself.
This world has corrupted the minds of many, and had even corrupted mine. The countless days of someone (or even me) pointing out the flaws of my image, the endless competition in my sport trying to be the best, the struggle of keeping people happy, always comparing myself to others, and being a “good Christian”, had taken over my mind.
It’s funny how God works sometimes. God knew that I was stubborn and wanted to do things on my own so what did he do? He waited for me to be on my knees and realize that I actually needed Him for everything. Now I didn’t really hit my breaking point until freshman year of high school. At a young life camp (which is an awesome camp where high school kids are taught about Christ), during one of the lessons I suddenly realized that I didn’t have to be perfect for God whatsoever or even have to be perfect for other people because only God’s thoughts of me were important. I actually had to be BROKEN. Because if I wasn’t broken, I wouldn’t have seen that I needed Him. Romans 8:39 says, “neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
No matter what we do, what we think, God still loves us no matter what. God’s grace and love is a lot bigger than you think, THANK THE LORD.
“The enemy tricks us into believing that we are not good enough because he knows if we discover the truth we’ll be unstoppable” – Holley Gerth
Go seek out the truth.